Fearlessness
by poloxsaum
Summary: Callie finally tells Lena and Stef what Liam did to her after Lena finds her in the kitchen late one night. Set after 2x06. (TW: rape/sexual assault, slight mention of self harm, mental health disorders. Read with caution.)


_A/N: I really wanted to write this, and I couldn't stop thinking about it. Hopefully, this will get me back into writing and I'll start writing 'Fire' again and uploading new chapters, which I'm really excited for. All mistakes are my own, I don't own the Fosters or any of the characters. I hope you enjoy this one shot. (TRIGGER WARNING: rape/sexual assault and slight mention of self harm. Read with caution)_

Callie lay awake in bed. It was the middle of the night, but she hadn't slept yet. It had been the same for the past few nights, ever since she had thought she had seen Liam at work after her and Wyatt had tried to have sex. She was terrified to sleep, in case she dreamt of Liam, in case she saw him again, in case she couldn't wake herself up and end the nightmare. She got up. She hated just lying there, thinking, it made things worse. She needed to be busy. And that was hard in the middle of the night while everyone was asleep. She needed to forget, to just think of anything else, even if it was for only a short while.

She went into the bathroom. She considered doing something she hadn't done in a very long time. At least, not since she had been at the Fosters or in juvie. It felt like she was a completely different person to who she was now. She was happy and safe and she knew that Stef and Lena loved her. And yet, Liam was still able to ruin that even know, even though she hadn't seen him and hadn't spoken to him. She hated that she felt this way again and she hated Liam and she hated herself.

She opened the cupboard and took out a razor blade before sitting on the floor. She held in, and played with it in her hands. She knew this was the only thing that would clear her head, give her a break, make her feel better, even if it was only for a little while. But she didn't want to do it, she didn't want to go back and lose all of the progress she had made over her time living with the Fosters. She knew from past experience how addictive it was when she started and she knew that the thoughts of Liam that were swimming through her mind weren't going away anytime soon. And she was scared. Really scared. That it had come to this point again, where she felt so low that this is what she turned to.

But now, in this house, she had a family and she was safe and she knew she could trust Lena and Stef. And they may be the only other things that could bring her some relief. Talking to them about it, letting them help her. She knew she could get away with not telling them everything and she knew that the relief, letting it, letting someone else know and help would be long term. But she would still have to make it through the night, alone. She noticed she was crying and tried to calm herself down - she didn't need anyone else waking up and she didn't want anyone finding her in this situation.

She decided to go downstairs, get a drink and calm down, at least that way she would be less likely to wake anyone else up. She stood, put the blade away and left the bathroom. She made her way downstairs and got herself a glass of water before sitting at the table. Liam's face appeared in her mind. The whole event started playing out in her mind, over and over again. She was shaking and she was finding it hard to breath. Tears were running down her cheeks onto the table, mixing with the water she had spilt. Her head was spinning and all she could see was Liam's face and hear his laugh. She couldn't breath and it was like he was lead on top of her, crushing her all over again. Then she felt someone's hands on her. Liam was here. She tried to scream but she could hardly catch her breath, so she tried to fight. Her arms were swinging around and she kicked her legs, standing up, but not being able to support herself, she fell to the floor. It was going to happen again, and at the Fosters, where she was safe. What if he went upstairs afterwards and hurt Mariana or Stef or Lena. She started begging, maybe she could get him to leave.

"Please don't hurt me. Let me go, please," she muttered over and over again.

And then she heard a familiar voice. It was Lena. Lena was here, and she was going to get hurt. She tried to tell her to leave, she had to protect her, Lena had already been through so much there past couple of weeks, with losing the baby. But she couldn't.

"Callie, baby, it's Lena. I'm not going to hurt you, you're safe," Callie heard.

Callie frowned. She was so sure Liam was here, what was happening. She could still feel him on her and see his face. But the hands were gone, there was no one on her. She sat up and shuffled backwards across the floor, trying to away. She brought her knees up. She heard Lena again, comforting her.

"You're okay, you're at home, and you're safe. It's Lena. I'm not going to hurt you. Just breathe for me baby."

Callie looked up. She found Lena's face amongst Liam's. She listened to what she was saying. She breathed. Slowly, Liam disappeared. She was back in the kitchen. Lena was sat in front of her, smiling, but she also looked scared. 'Scared of her?' Callie thought. She had completed freaked out, spilt her drink all over the floor, knocked her stool over and had been begging her not to hurt her.

"I'm sorry," Callie muttered, not meeting Lena's gaze

"You've got nothing to be sorry for, it's okay, I'm okay, you didn't hurt me or wake the others," Lena told her.

"I woke you, and I made a mess of the kitchen," Callie said.

Lena suddenly remembered the mess that had been made. But she wasn't worried about that, she was worried about Callie. The girl had completely freaked out and hadn't been able to recognise her. She had been begging her not to hurt her and Lena couldn't understand why. She hoped Callie would be able to talk to her, or Stef about what had happened.

"I wasn't asleep. I was coming down to join you when I saw you crying at the table. I didn't realise you were upset," Lean said.

Callie just shrugged. She didn't want to add to Lena's worry or stress and she had never told anyone else what had happened with Liam and she didn't want to start now. Lena and Stef might not want her if she told them what had happened, and they might not want Jude either. They could reverse his adoption, and send them away and she couldn't ruin this for Jude, it was too good.

"It's nothing, I'm fine, sorry," Callie said, still not looking up at Lena.

"Look at me Callie," Lena said. Callie glanced up and found Lena smiling at her. "You don't have to apologise for anything. It's okay, I promise. And you know you can tell us anything, nothing you can say will make us not want you, or Jude. We aren't just going to send you away Callie. We love you and you matter and you're part of this family no matter what."

Callie's eyes welled up. She wanted to tell them. She wanted to tell someone, just to get it off her chest. She had been holding on to this secret for so long and it had been holding her down all that time. And she finally had people who she could trust, who loved her and Jude. And she was still terrified. Lena knew her so well, as did Stef. She could tell what she was thinking, and was she was worrying about. It made Callie aware of how much attention they payed to her, and how much they cared about her.

"You don't have to talk to me. You can talk to Stef, if you would prefer. But we're worried about you. We know somethings wrong, we've noticed something must have happened, over the past few days you've been acting strange, pushing us away, we just didn't realise it was this bad. You know you can talk to us at any time, right?"

Callie shrugged, then nodded. "I thought I could deal with it, by myself, and I didn't want to worry you, or make anything harder for you, like with everything that had happened with Frankie I thought it would be better if I didn't tell you," she admitted quietly.

She didn't know how Lena would react to this. Lena smiled sadly, looked down and nodded. She understood what Callie was saying, and that she hadn't meant to upset her, but Lena was sad that the girl felt as though she was unable to come to her and Stef when she was feeling like this, and that she had put her own needs behind theirs.

Lena was about to speak, when they heard the stairs creak. The both turned towards the kitchen entrance, and Callie's heart rate increased again. She didn't want anyone else finding her like this. Stef walked round the corner, and Callie breathed a small sigh of relief. At least it wasn't one of her siblings. She loved them, but she didn't want them finding her like this.

"What's going on," Stef said, taking in the mess. "Did you have a party without me or something?" she joked

Only then, did she look towards the two sat on the floor and took in their expressions. Then her tone turned serious, worry creeping up on her.

"Is everything okay?"

She rushed over to where they were sat, the other side of the kitchen from where she was stood, and she knelt down in front of Callie, like Lena was.

"Callie and I are just having a chat. She couldn't sleep and I think she just got caught up in her thoughts," Lena explained, knowing Callie wouldn't want her to tell Stef exactly what had happened. Stef and she would talk later.

Callie looked down again, she felt even worse now that she knew she had woken Stef up. They had all been through so much recently, and she knew that Stef, as well as Lena, would need their sleep.

"Are these thoughts the same things that have been bothering you these past few days?" Stef asked.

When Callie didn't answer, Lena took it upon herself to answer for her.

"She didn't want us to worry, or add anything on top of everything that has happened. She thought she could deal with it herself," Lena explained.

Stef's heart broke. She loved Callie, and it made her so upset that she felt as though she was unable to come to them with something that was causing her so much pain.

"Callie, you know you can talk to us about anything, at any time. You don't need to put us first. We're the parents and it's our job to look after you, to make sure you're okay. I know you were just thinking of us, but it's okay, we can still worry about you and you can still come to us, even when things are hard for us," Stef explained.

They had had a hard time getting Callie to understand that she didn't need to look after anyone, and that she could just be a teenager. They both knew that it would take time for her to stop looking out for everyone else before herself and realise that she didn't have to be a parent to anyone anymore.

"I'm sorry," Callie muttered.

"You've got nothing to be sorry for, just talk to us," Stef said.

Lena still had her hand on Callie's knee, stroking it slightly, in attempt to bring some comfort to the girl, without freaking her out like she had earlier when she had touched her. Callie nodded her head slightly. She could do this, and she knew that Stef and Lena would still love her. Maybe telling someone else would feel good, and maybe she would finally be free of some of her demons.

"Just tell us as much as you want, we don't want to push you or make things worse. Shall we go and sit on the couch?" Lena asked.

She was suddenly worried that this might make things worse, and that there was possibly another reason why Callie wasn't telling them what had happened, or what was wrong. She knew that having the kids talk to them was often good, but Callie had been through more than Stef and she knew, and they both knew they may not have the ability to deal with it, in terms of emotions and qualifications. Stef nodded and stood up, as did Lena, and they helped Callie up off the floor.

The sat on the couch, with Callie in the middle, and Stef and Lena on either side. Callie let out a big sigh, not believing that she was about to do this. Stef and Lena shared a look over Callie's head.

"We can do this tomorrow, if you would prefer to go back to bed now," Stef told her.

Callie shook her head, she wouldn't be able to sleep now, and she worked up the courage to finally tell them. If she left it until tomorrow, she might not be able to say it, she might talk herself out of it. She looked forward, not wanting to make eye contact with them while she was talking.

"A couple years ago, me and Jude were placed in a really good home, defiantly the best one before here, and we really thought that we would stay there and it was our last home. They were really nice and they looked after us, and they treated us like we weren't foster kids, right from the start. They had a son, Liam, older than us who was really nice to us both. Like he treated us like real siblings, not like all the other homes we had been in and I really thought it was going to be different."

Callie paused, rubbing her hands in her pyjama pants. They were sweaty, and she was sure her voice was shaking, but she wanted to carry on.

"He used to pick us from school, and put candy in my bag so I would always be thinking of him in school. And we used to watch films together all the time and hold hands, even when his parents were there. His parents used to leave us home alone sometimes, just the two of us so we would mess around together and he used to chase me. It was just so nice to have someone paying attention to me, and just being so nice to me. I didn't really know any different at that point, and I thought I loved him and that he loved me."

Callie paused, and Stef and Lena looked at each other. They didn't know that Callie had ever been in a relationship with any other of her foster brothers, and that explained everything that had happened with Brandon. They both had no idea what how or why this had affected her now, this had happened years ago.

"One night, he came into my room. It was pretty late, I had been asleep and he woke me up. He started kissing me, and asked me to have sex with him. I didn't want to, and I told him no, but he wouldn't listen to me, and he… he uh, forced me to have sex with him," Callie said, muttering at the end.

She sighed. She couldn't believe that she had just told them. She didn't want to look up. In case they got mad with her. In case they saw her crying. She knew she could trust them, but she was still terrified.

Stef and Lena didn't know what to say. They were both trying to hold it together. Stef sat back on the couch, not believing what Callie had told them. She couldn't believe how much their little girl had gone through in the time that she had been on the system. She had to stop herself crying, she didn't want to upset Callie anymore that she clearly was. Lena felt her heart break for the girl sat next to her. She had been through so much, and Lena just wanted to hug her, keep her safe and protected. She took Callie's hand in her own and squeezed it tight.

"Thank you for telling us sweetie. It means a lot to us," Lena said.

It meant so much to them, that Callie had been able to talk to them about this. And although, it had taken a while for her to come to them, they were both glad that she finally had been able to. They couldn't explain it to Callie, they didn't know how to, but it meant that she was finally comfortable with them, and that's all they had wanted. That and for her to be safe in their house.

However, neither of them knew how this had started affecting her now. It seemed sudden, and they couldn't think of anything that would bring this on. They didn't know if it was something to do with Brandon, after all, it may explain why she ran away after he had kissed her. Stef kissed Callie on the head, ensuring she knew that they were proud of her, and that they loved her. She voiced it anyway, just to make sure.

"We're so proud of you Callie, and we love you. This doesn't change anything, we feel the same, and we still want you to be part of this family," Stef said.

Lena nodded in agreement, even though Callie still hadn't looked at them.

"That's not it. There's something else. The other day, me and Wyatt tried to have sex," Callie told them.

She knew it wasn't a violation of her parole, and she felt awkward telling them this, but she also knew it was important. Stef sat forward and took Callie's hand, terrified that the person they trusted with their daughter had done something terrible to her

"You tried to have sex?" she asked.

"I sort of freaked out, I don't know, like a panic attack or something and I couldn't breathe," she explained.

"And he stopped? When you asked him too?"

Callie nodded. "He didn't force me or anything, and he stopped straight away. He was just confused. Or still is confused I guess," she told them. "And now, I keep seeing Liam's everywhere I go. At work, at school, just in the street. And I keep having these panic attacks. I thought I was over him."

"Listen, honey, it takes as long as it takes for a person to get over something like this. It doesn't just happen, and it's different for everyone. Sometimes people need help, or to talk about and sometimes people can deal with these things by themselves. It's okay not to be okay," Lena said.

Callie had started crying. She felt so ashamed and embarrassed about it. Stef started rubbing her back slightly.

"We are so proud of you. And like Lena said, it's okay that you're not okay right now. You've dealt with a lot of things over the past few years without having time to deal with them properly, it was bound to come back up, but we will help you however we can and we want you to feel as though you can trust us," Stef explained.

She was mad, and she was finding it hard to concentrate on what she was saying at the moment as all she could think about was what Liam had done to her little girl. She didn't know if she was making sense and her train of thought was getting mixed up. But she needed to be there for their daughter at the moment, and could focus on getting justice for her when Callie was ready.

Callie had to ask them something she was dreading. She needed to know if they were going to send her away. She knew that they would keep Jude, but she was so unsure now that they wouldn't want her. She just kept making trouble for them and bringing new things up and she made their life so hard.

"Do you still want me? Please don't send me away," she said, almost begging them.

Stef and Lena sighed and hugged Callie tight. It was a little awkward from the positions they were sat in.

"There is nothing you could ever do, or say that would make us not want you. This is part of your past, and something that has made you who you are. We aren't going to send you away for that. It's not your fault, you're not to blame for this and you didn't do anything wrong. We're just happy you could tell us," Lena said to her.

They sat on the couch like that for a while, leaning back with Stef and Lena hugging her tight. They didn't want to let her go, and they didn't think they could. Stef and Lena didn't talk. They were both in shock, and didn't think they could without crying. Lena's eyes were already glassy from all the unshed tears she was holding back and Stef was struggling to hold hers back.

"Thank you, for everything. For keeping me and Jude after everything. For keeping us safe and for loving us. I'm so happy here. Happier than I've ever been. I love you. We both do, and I hope you know that," Callie said, crying.

After that, Stef and Lena were crying. That's what they wanted. For any children who came into their home to feel safe, happy and loved, and they were so glad that Callie and Jude felt that way. They loved the children so much, and both knew that they were supposed to be their children. They knew that the children knew that, after all they were adopting them, but hearing Callie say it out loud meant so much to them. Sometimes they wondered if Callie really knew, or if she really wanted to be with them. But they knew, after tonight, they would never have to doubt her again.

"We love you too, so much, and we're so sorry that you couldn't get adopted and we're so sorry about everything you've been through, but we still want to adopt you and you're still our daughter, no matter what," Stef told her.

Lena kissed Callie on the head, and gave her one final squeeze, as did Stef, before deciding that it was time to go back to bed.

"Do you want to come and sleep in our bed tonight?" they asked Callie.

She shook her head. She felt better, and she didn't want to intrude. She could guess how they were feeling, and she knew that they needed some time together. She could manage in her own bed, and she knew that if she was having a hard time, she could go and talk to them.

"I'm okay, but I know where you are if I need you," she told them, smiling.

They all went upstairs, and before Stef and Lena went to bed, they checked on all their children, making sure they were all safe. They whispered goodnight to Callie and both gave her a kiss, before going to their own bed.

The climbed under the covers and held each other close.

 _A/N: I could potentially write another chapter, about Stef and Lena and their feelings and what happened, if anyone's interested, or make this into a mulit-chapter fic, but for now it's going to stay as a one shot. If anyone is interested in me carrying this on, please leave me a review, you can also leave me a review with like improvements and stuff, because that would be super helpful. I will be working on Fire now, and will hopefully be updating that soon so please go and check that out if you haven't already, and keep your eyes open for updates! Thanks for reading._


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